In Defense of the Indefencible

Greetings Listeners,

It is with a heavy heart that I write this Defending Argument, but I feel as though I must. Back in 2013, on Episode 4 (Cold Showers in Coed Bathrooms) I took a position that there should be no coed bathrooms. I argued an argument based on biological sex rather than gender. I made this argument not only based on parts, but based on stereotypes of men being creepy and gross in bathrooms. While I stand by those last two points, I now realize the folly of my ways. I, like the conventional bathroom, linked sex and gender and assumed that no potential mate of mine wants to hear the noises and smell the smells coming from the men's rooms that I am all too familiar with.

In my argument I didn't mention the main reason why men are reluctant to share the bathroom with women. I believe that men don't want women in the bathroom for the same reason that they never want to use a urinal next to another man. I refer to this concept as "phallus-guarding". When men urinate, they are slightly vulnerable, in that a major reproductive organ is outside of the confines and protection of clothing. Men who are afraid of harm or embarrassment would tend to be paranoid and even use a stall rather than a urinal, because of the extra distance and reduced sight-lines. 

This brings me to my proposal. Convert every men's room into a pee room and every women's room into a poop room. Both rooms would be genderless.

The pee room (indicated by a "#1" on the door) is for moments when pee is the focus of the bathroom trip. Urinal stalls from the former "men's room" would be given larger walls around them for greater protection, and stalls would be reserved for those needing to sit (unable to use urinals because of lack of parts or mobility). 

The poop room (indicated by a "#2" on the door) is for moments when pooping is the goal. Music would be played loud enough to drown out all other activity, and natural odor killing elements should be used. Plenty of extra TP in every stall and a variety of soaps at the sinks. Stalls could be used by anyone, but must be used one at a time.

That's my proposal! If you love it or hate it, please feel free to let us know at Again, I'm sorry if I caused any harm with my comments. I was wrong, but now I'm right. Any anyone who doesn't like this plan can suck on a rock.